I can always tell if my life is out of balance when my closet and my laundry room are a mess. My desk, though, my desk is ALWAYS a mess, and I like it that way.

Because I feel like balance is an inside out kind of thing. You can only be truly organized, balanced, at peace, if the smallest unseen corner is also organized, balanced and at peace. Even if the front room that everyone sees is a mess, I can find peace that my closet is organized. Go figure.

That seems like a lot of pressure and even as I wrote it, something in my chest pinched. But I don’t mean you can’t have peace if you throw all the junk from the counter into your bedroom when company comes. I just mean that Peace is an inner state.

And I don’t have much peace when my life is out of balance. In fact, I feel uncharacteristically stressed when life is out of balance. I can accomplish tons of things, be always busy, juggle many projects at once as long as I’m balanced. But I can be doing only two things and feel completely overwhelmed if there is an imbalance.

What do I mean by imbalance? I’m not sure how everyone else works, but I have some pillars that need to be present in my life in representative amounts, and that creates balance for me.

Pillar One: I need to feel fulfilled and connected in my family life. Nothing will ever be perfect at home, but I need to feel like my relationships with the family members are loving and that we are all progressing.

Pillar Two: I need to progress in my passions. Right now this is writing and all that comes with being an Author.

Pillar Three: Friends, connections, service, volunteering–This is basically all the other people outside of my family in my life.

Pillar Four: A peaceful and organized space. I am not sure how much of a pillar this is for me, but I think it is important. And everyone’s version of organized is different. But I am realizing more and more that my space needs to be in control or my balance is off.

Pillar Five: I need to feel at peace with and connected to God.

If any of these pillars is off kilter, I am off kilter. And none of the others function well for very long.


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An award winning author and mother of six. Check out my news and published historical romances. Whether in Regency England, the French Revolution, or Colonial America, her romance novels are much like life is supposed to be: full of adventure. She is a member of the RWA, the SCBWI, and LDStorymakers. She is also the chair of the Lonestar.Ink writing conference. Twitter—@authorjen Instagram—@authorlyjen

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